All kinds of food make a Fewd Snob a Fewd Snob. Sure, stuff like pizza, hot dogs, and beer come to mind first. But there is so much more. If you have read some reviews on our site, you see what we mean.
And yet, there is one Fewd Snob staple that we haven’t reviewed yet. Cereal.
Yes, cereal. Maybe the thought of chowing down on a big bowl of cereal doesn’t excite you. It should. There is no question that cereal is a Fewd Snob food. Sure, it is good in the morning for breakfast. But, it is also good in the afternoon for breakfast. You know…you get up at 3 after a hard night of drinking. Breakfast time! And you’re too hungover to make up a greasy breakfast. What do you go for? Cereal of course! You’re smart!
Hell, cereal is good at all times. Dinner? Why not. Midnight snack? Yep. And the best part is that it is easy! It is so easy, even Denny will do it! Pour the stuff in a bowl and pour milk over it. Who has time to make a sandwich? Cereal it is!
General Mills has introduced its first new cereal in 15 years. Yes, you read that right. 15 years! We had no idea it had been that long. According to General Mills’ blog, the company has introduced other cereals in that time. Those cereals were, “…extensions of existing brands or licensing agreements, such as Reese’s Puffs.” So, this is General Mills first truly new creation in a long damn time.
First of all, we know what you’re thinking. “Tiny Toast?? You guys are reviewing something called TINY Toast??!”
Sure, Tiny Toast sounds a little delicate for our site. It kind of sounds like something you would have with your afternoon tea. And saying that doesn’t help with our cause. “Yes, I would like some Tiny Toast with a spot of tea, thank you kind sir!”
Look, cereal is good. Screw the name. Pour some beer in it instead of milk. There, now it fits our site! Let’s move on, shall we??
Tiny Toast is primarily made of whole grain oats and whole grain corn. General Mills is pushing that the cereal has no high fructose corn syrup, no artificial colors, and no artificial flavors. We could give two shits about all that. And if you care, you are probably on the wrong site. But hey, there’s plenty of beer to go around for everybody here, right? RIGHT?
There is real fruit in here in some kind of a dried powder form. Very natural! Whatever. Check out all the details here, because we don’t care. All we care about is if the stuff is good or not.
We picked up a box of each to test. We wanted to make a well-balanced, healthy breakfast out of this test, though. So, we filled up our glass with orange juice and vodka, and we were ready to go!
We started with the strawberry flavor.
Look! Tiny Toast! Amazing!
It does look like tiny pieces of toast. We know we always wanted toast cereal. Didn’t you?? No?? Have another beer…
We added milk. Or is that RumChata? We’re not telling…
Now, on to the blueberry.
Looks the same, but with blueberries. Imagine that!
Toast with RumChata again…we mean milk…
Yeah, that’s milk! See how the blueberry stuff comes off the toast and gets in the milk?! The strawberry did that too, but Herman was too loaded from RumChata…milk…to get a shot of that.
We originally wanted to review these separately. But, there really is no need. These cereals are identical except for the fruit flavors.
We popped open the boxes, and there was a strong smell of real strawberries and blueberries. The fruit doesn’t smell fake. Evidently, General Mills prides itself on this. Go back to the link we highlighted above to read about that, because we are too lazy to do it again for you.
Dry, the consistency of the cereal is mildly crunchy. It won’t tear the roof of your mouth apart, but it does have some crunch still. The texture gives a little bit of the effect of actual toast. Denny thinks so more than Herman. The crunch gives it the toast effect. In terms of flavor, you taste the toasted flavor of toast, if that makes sense. You don’t taste bread. But you wouldn’t expect to with oats and corn. Amazingly, General Mills captured a toast effect with no wheat in sight. Food science!
The flavor of the “toast” is plentiful, but not too strong. It balances with the fruit.
We must point out that this is NOT a sweet, sugary cereal. There is some sugar on there, but it just gives a slight sweetness. Both kinds are NOT blow your face off sugary sweet. Yet, there is enough sweetness to appeal to just about everyone.
Back to the fruit…it actually does taste real. Most fruit cereals that don’t use actual dried fruit pieces taste artificial. The strawberry and blueberry flavors are certainly there, and certainly real tasting. Again, the fruit flavor balances well with the toast flavor. Neither one takes over.
With milk, (or RumChata, if you’re paying attention!) the cereal tastes identical to the way it tastes dry. This is unusual. Most cereals taste a little different when drenched in milk. That’s not the case here.
The consistency changed, of course. Most of the crunch went away after a few minutes. But, the cereal kept its shape and didn’t just fall apart in the milk. It didn’t turn to mush either.
The really interesting thing here is that this cereal is really good with milk, but it would also make a great snack right out of the box. We could actually see eating this stuff alone as a snack (or a drunk snack!).
Overall, we both really like Tiny Toast. Both flavors. We couldn’t help but think the concept was kind of goofy. What exactly are they going after here? The toast pieces don’t taste like toast with jelly on it. That would be MUCH sweeter. This stuff just tastes like toast with fruit on it. What the hell is that? We don’t know, but the stuff is great. We would both buy it again.
A box of Tiny Toast will set you back about three bucks. The boxes aren’t huge by any means, but specialty cereals cost more than the ginormous box of Corn Flakes that is big enough to feed an army for 2 bucks. Tiny Toast is on par with any other premium name-brand cereal. It’s a good value.
Tiny Toast is good stuff. That’s all there is to it. We hope that these stick around, because we want more. We can see this cereal appealing to just about everybody. It isn’t really geared towards one target audience. And we aren’t even drunk from our screwdrivers or RumChata.
For the first new thing in 15 years, we would say that you nailed it General Mills.
