Fewd Fight! Coors Light Vs. Miller Lite

In the modern era we unfortunately live in, it seems that traditional American “get drunk” beers have fallen out of favor.  Even though they still sell tons of barrels, it seems that Millennials prefer drinking fruity and “aromatic” beers instead of good old fashioned American brews.  There is some debate if Herman and Denny fall into the Millennial category, but they probably wouldn’t claim it if they did.  The Fewd Snobs have nothing against home brews.  In fact, they agree that some are pretty good.  But by definition, the Fewd Snobs will never, EVER turn their noses up to a light beer.  Unless it’s Natty (sorry Natty drinkers, we love you too!  But we are Fewd Snobs, not high schoolers!)

Since the inception of this site, we knew this post would be inevitable.  To the Fewd Snobs, this is the ultimate match-up.  Red Sox vs. Yankees.  Cowboys vs. Giants.  Pepsi vs. Coke.  Dogs and cats living together!  Mass hysteria! Now that we are going to get sued by Columbia Pictures, we shall move on!

Herman’s Thoughts:  I guess some people would question the real differences between Coors Light and Miller Light.  Especially now that they are under the same company.  But, my momma raised her boy on Coors Light.  And if it was good enough for her, then it’s good enough for me.  She also instilled in me that Coors Light has to be cold, ICE cold.  Before they had blue mountains on the can, the best way to tell if your beer was cold enough was by what else was in the fridge.  If the soda and water were on the verge of freezing, then your beer was cold enough.  Now, lets get to the swill that is Miller Light.  I’ve never been able to stomach the stuff.  Unless it’s free.  ‘Cause let’s face it, free beer tastes better!  But other than that, give me an ice cold, rocky mountain brewed silver bullet.  It even tastes great on tap, which is more than I can say for Miller.  And really, if Coors Light is so bad, why is it that Denny will drink it when he runs out of Miller?  I for one can solemnly (or is it soberly) swear that I have never drank one of his Millers should I run out.  But being the borderline alcoholic that I am, I never let myself run out, HO HO!

Denny’s Thoughts:  Miller Lite is the perfect American beer. First of all, it is a pilsner beer. And that just makes it rock. Right from the can itself, “We use choice hops from the Pacific Northwest as well as noble Saaz hops and deliver more taste, aroma and color with only 96 calories per 12oz.” What does it all mean? Hell if I know. But I do know that Miller Lite has a bright, crisp, and refreshing flavor. And at 96 calories per can or bottle, it won’t make you too fat. Now when you put away 12 or more, that may be another story. But that’s not what we are talking about right now…

The flavor is what makes this beer. It isn’t too heavy, and yet it isn’t too light (yes, yes, I said it. By AMERICAN “get drunk” beer standards, it isn’t too light.) It strikes a perfect balance. There is no aftertaste that is bitter. Miller Lite also makes a mean Summer Brew. It is good for red beer. It’s great for drinking when you need something to quench your thirst after mowing the lawn (or in my case, while I sit on the front porch watching a company mow my lawn!) It is just perfect.

I will always argue that this is the perfect light beer. I don’t care what the young people say. It isn’t my fault they are all stupid.

And as far as Coors Light goes, Coors Light isn’t as bright. It has a slight bitter aftertaste in my opinion. It doesn’t quench like Miller Lite. Now as I have said in a different post, I’ll drink it if I run out and that is what Herman is offering (or I am stealing!), but there is no question that the props go to Lite.

And finally, look at the cans. I realize that the can doesn’t make the beer. But it is telling, to me, that Coors went with an all-new style fancy flat-font can. Miller permanently went back to the retro can. When Miller first brought out the retro can, I said they should keep it. It looks SO MUCH BETTER than the stupid can they had before they brought this one back. And they decided to keep it. So while Coors Light goes chasing trends, Miller Lite is going with the tried and true.

And yet, the parent company is MillerCoors.

Whatever. Put down the wheat beer, looks like someone with a UTI pissed in a pint glass crap for a minute. Come over and fight the good fight for a few. And whatever you do, do NOT go with Coors Light. It’s Miller Time!