Yes, you read right. We are reviewing a frozen pizza. Not only is it a frozen pizza, but it’s a $3 frozen pizza. And it is petty damn good.
Nobody expects pizzeria quality pizza when cooking a frozen pizza. And yet, for something you can stick in the oven and have ready in about 20 minutes as opposed to calling for delivery, waiting for it while taking a nap, and then it’s cold when it arrives, frozen pizza is sometimes an essential. Plus, a delivery pizza is gonna cost about five times as much. And it also is pretty good after a dozen beers (while you are still able to operate the oven!). Beats waiting. You’ll pass out before the pizza gets there.
Now, we have nothing against pizza places or delivery pizza. In fact, there will be plenty of that upcoming. But when you are eating on the cheap, and still want something that’s pretty good, frozen pizza it is.
The directions call for 400 degrees. You can speed the process up by cooking it on 425, but it does seem to cook a little more evenly on 400. We have noticed if you put the pizza directly on the rack (like the directions call for) the pizza curls up a little on the corners…
This isn’t a problem when you cut the pizza, usually. Once in a while the crust may crack on the edge if it is too curled up. When we tried cooking it on a pizza pan (the kind with the holes in the bottom), the pizza didn’t curl. It doesn’t get as crisp on the bottom crust, but it is perfectly fine.
You can pay attention to the directions for the cook time, but we wouldn’t. Eyeball it. You can also get out your thermometer and measure for 160 degrees internal temperature, but if you do that, once again we say that you’re on the wrong site! We like our pizza to have a nice golden brown to it, with some nice brown edges. But it is also good with a whiter cheese. If the edges curl on you, and the middle doesn’t look completely done, we have found that turning on the broiler for a couple minutes will put a nice golden finish on the pie. This is also a good trick for those of you that like your pizza to resemble your mom’s meatloaf. And no, we aren’t going to review it, so don’t ask.
The crust is a perfect size. It isn’t too cracker-thin, but it isn’t one of those HUGE crusts, where the crust is like eating a breadstick.
This leads into the toppings. The toppings cover the entire pizza, which is pretty good for three bucks. The Supreme has sausage, pepperoni, peppers, black olives, and onions. The pepperoni is very good. It doesn’t get greasy. It crisps on the edges (be careful not to overcook here, kids). It has a mild to moderate taste. It certainly isn’t overpowering, but it still has a good pepperoni flavor. Best of all, it isn’t too salty. There is plenty of sausage (HA HA HO HO). It is typical frozen pizza sausage. It isn’t an Italian sausage. There isn’t any fennel. This is more of a pork sausage. The black olives are good because they add a little flavor, but they aren’t overpowering. Too many times, a pizza is killed by black olives that are too strong. These fit right in. The onion and peppers give the pizza some heft and texture, but the flavors don’t particularly stand out. All together, the toppings fit perfectly to remind you that you’re eating a supreme pizza.
This pizza, amazingly, is good when leftover. In case you aren’t completely drunk, and don’t eat the whole thing, you can actually eat it the next day! It is actually good cold, or a few minutes in the microwave on a reheat setting. If you want to get fancy, the toaster oven would crisp it back up nicely.
Wanna make this $3 dollar pizza even better? Throw some Tabasco on it. It blends perfectly with the flavor of the pizza without overpowering it. Another thing we stumbled across that makes this pizza even better is putting some celery salt on it. Yes, celery salt. Don’t ask how we figured this out. The taste is even better with it. But don’t put too much.
Overall, this is a damn good pizza. Seems to us that Tombstone used to kinda suck. It was considered a pretty crap brand of frozen pie. But something has changed. It is excellent now. Well worth the money, and 20 minutes to cook it.